We all have things we don’t like about ourselves- maybe our legs are too short, hips too wide, too many freckles, can’t stick to a workout plan, can’t say no to mud cake… It might be a little twinge of discontent that we notice when we think about these things, and then we just get on with the rest of the day.
If however, like many of us, it’s more than just a small occasional feeling, and instead is a frequent, and quite nasty voice in our head berating us, it might be time to shift things. Ask yourself these questions:
Would you talk to your best friend the way you talk to yourself?
So often we are willing to criticise ourselves, setting such unrealistic standards, and being so cruel to ourselves if we don’t meet these standards. If you take some time today to notice your self talk, take note of whether that voice is understanding- “I don’t like my extra weight, but I’ve lost 10kg this year, so I have a lot to be proud of”- or overly critical and negative – “What’s 10kg when I have 30 to lose, until I get to my goal weight I’m not worthy.”
Notice the same weight loss amount has triggered two vastly different interpretations. What type of self talk have you noticed in yourself? Which version do you think would be more helpful in the long run for reaching your goals? Rule of thumb- if you wouldn’t say it to your bestie, you shouldn’t be saying it to yourself.
Are you fixating?
Fixating is where there is something about yourself that your mind keeps wandering back to, dozens, if not hundreds of times a day. And it’s not necessarily a bad thing.
Fixating on improving your health could mean that you find many opportunities in a day to take little steps or make small choices to be healthier- taking the stairs instead of the elevator, choosing fruit for morning tea, drinking water throughout the day etc. Each of these small parts add up to a whole day where you’ve made great progress in improving your health.
The problem occurs when the fixation is on a negative,